Aren't these the most beautiful little girls you have ever seen? (From the left to right, we have Liz, Rachel, and Autumn.) Ok, so they're not so little; two of them start college this fall, and one is engaged to be married. These girls are from the student ministry I have been working with for the past 3 or 4 years. More specifically, they have been my small group, or "cell" group, and eventually the four of us formed an accountability group. Needless to say, I am really close to these girls. I have been a part of their lives since they were in junior high!
It's an amazing responsibility to be placed in a mentoring position. I must say that I learned as much from them as they might have learned from me. The time I have spent with them over the years has been a BLAST. These are the silliest and most hilarious girls of all time. There have been tough times--times I wish I could protect them from the storms of life, or from making poor choices. I had to learn, however, that they belonged to God, not me. I can only hope that the example I lived before them had a positive impact and that Jesus was reflected. I often wonder why He uses me for ministry such as this, and then I remember the "resumes" of the disciples and the apostles, and everyone else He has used throughout history. Then I don't feel quite so bad. It's not that I am able, but that I am willing to be used by God. It has become another confirmation that "God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called". It's another step in the journey, preparing me for the future. Because these beautiful ladies are moving on and moving out, our relationship will never be the same. It makes me sad. But I thank God for the bond that has been created, for it's the type of bond that will stand the test of time.
Recently I had the opportunity to visit the U.K. for some training. They really had to twist my arm to get me to go, but I finally relented. Yea right! I was stoked! I spent 8 days in southern England, and in a word, it was BRILLIANT! The climate, the people, the fresh fish for dinner. . . a friend of mine, Swanger, asked if I would consider living there? In a heart beat, my friends! I don't feel bad at all for praying that God will send me to the U.K. someday. I just wish I had a chance to see more of the country, but they had us pretty busy in training.
I included this picture because it's one of my favorites. It's the view out the window of my Bed & Breakfast. I was so excited to get all of my film developed--all six rolls! :) It has yet to cease to amaze me how God is blessing me on this journey. To be able to meet His people all over the country, and now THE WORLD, is a blessing I truly underestimated. We had the opportunity to look at so many different cultures and it is beautiful how everyone is so different. It shows the majesty of God and His creativity to see such huge differences and yet still have the common thread of Christ's love to hold us together. I also chose this picture because it signifies how my worldview is changing . . . with every person I meet and every place I go, my eyes are being opened to how grand the plan of God truly is. He also shows me the great span of His Hand -- it has to be huge for all of us to fit in the palm of it! :)
Into British stuff? Try this link, smash hits, and listen to the online radio station. It's brilliant!
If I had to narrow down all the training I have had in the past couple of years, it would be with two words SELF-AWARENESS. I have learned about my personality and how I relate to other people, leadership, and my God. I have learned about how my past may affect my future, how I might react in a crisis situation, how to travel alone, and how say goodbye in a healthy way that won't leave loose ends. I have been scrutinized by others, which can be very uncomfortable! I have listened to what other people think of me and tried to take things constructively. I have cried, and laughed, and cried some more. But in all of this I feel that God is preparing me for the Calling He has placed on my life. In one of my training settings I was presented with the De-motivators website where I found the poster shown to the right. It sums up perfectly what I have been trying to accomplish in the past couple years of becoming more "self-aware". When armed with a better understanding of who I am in Christ, there will be fewer surprises (or PROJECTILES!) that can threaten to bring a raging storm on my life and ministry. It is said that the number one reason why people leave my ministry is an inability to get along with their teammates, and not too far down on the list are personal problems that only intensify as the huge changes and transitions come along. The changes are unavoidable, but the awareness is up to us! It's not easy sometimes, but God has been right there in the middle of it; showing me where I need to allow Him to tweak things, and encouraging me in the places where I have been successful. Sometimes I have had to throw up my hands and say "Just start all over, Lord!" But He is faithful. And I trust Him for my preparation, regardless of how painful it might be!
Webster describes 'joy' as "a very glad feeling; happiness; delight". The Christian hymn speaks of "joy unspeakable and full of glory". According to paid advertisements, "JOY" can be found in a sink full of dirty dishes. But how do we as followers of Christ define joy?
I have found in my short 30 years that definitions differ from person to person, and often become relative to circumstances. But the joy we search for, even crave, cannot be found in circumstances, and certainly not in a sink of dirty dishes! As our journeys in Christ continue on we are often taught that Christ's joy should be unshakable, even foundational, and has little to do with whether we are "happy or delighted". His joy comes from knowing the end of the story. It's like the southern gospel tune, "I read the back of the book, and WE WIN!" We find in strength in knowing Who is in control of the storms around us, and can therefore say we have found true joy.
But what about when that storm hits? How about that unexpected detour in our journey that leads us to a place we never imagined? When we are standing alone, soaked to the bone in life's reality, can we still say there is joy? Can we peer through the darkness and thank God we're facing this trial or even tragedy?
Looking back, I can mark my life by the storms that have raged. I'd like to say that I have learned a lesson or some deep spiritual truth from every one of them. But, while the Lord has certainly provided revelations over time that have shaped my life, there are still questions in the back of my mind. But a decision was made long ago -- a crisis of faith -- and it has kept me from completely cracking under the pressure. I have chosen joy -- I trust that all things work together for good because I love the Lord Jesus Christ and I know He sees the end from the beginning. But Joy has also chosen me -- it is by his grace that joy is cultivated within me. I have chosen the seed, but He supplies the growth by His grace.
And so I have chosen to create this blog in order to share my journey; the experiences, the blessings, the miracles, the lessons and the TRIALS that come on this path that God has chosen for me. It is my prayer that I will honor Him and that He will use my life to touch others.
